Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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