Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i think i have herpe
just one?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
My feet surprised me
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