the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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