Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
