Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize