I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I'm always down for nudity.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
