if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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