Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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