This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
