Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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