if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
