bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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