he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
