I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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