I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Randomize