The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize
