Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize