I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
