He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
