I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
