is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Boobs speak an international language.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
