Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
