Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
