I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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