what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
