A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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