laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
