we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
