Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
