i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
