Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
