we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
