3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
