I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize