I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
She's the barista slut.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
