One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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