there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
