Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
