god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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