In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize