Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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