and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
