The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
