Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
