OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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