You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
