they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize