I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
