God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Randomize
