2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
